Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer topped the box office over the weekend. No shock there. But what is shocking - mind-boggling, even - is that the superhero sequel made 57.7 million over the frame. For those of you who aren't box office stat nerds, that's more than the original Fantastic Four made in its opening weekend. This is important because it again signals that American moviegoers are the dumbest people on the planet. You feed us crap, we eat it. We say the crap tastes like, well, crap. You proceed to serve us crap again, and instead of saying, "This tastes like crap," we shovel even more crap in our mouths the second time.
We couldn't be more disgusted in you, America. We're sorry to start the day off on such a sour note, but like Tiger Woods's nipples, we woke up a little prickly this morning.
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